Assalamualaikum..
Sudah lama gw ngga nulis di blog.. akhirnya ada waktu juga buat shareing.. kali ini gw mau cerita tentang masalah yang sering di keluhkan setiap insan Manusia yaitu CINTA atau percintaan, apalagi jaman sekarang anak SD udah ada yang pacaran.. aiiihhh miris gw dengernya. Kalo masalah liat secara langsung sih belom pernah cuma..., dengernya aja gw udah miris apalagi kalo liat langsung, masya allah... jangan sampe anak gw nanti ngikut anak sekarang yah yang hobi pacaran (amin).
Ok, ngomongin masalah umur nih selama 23 tahun 9 bulan 74 hari gw hidup di dunia ini banyak banget pelajaran tentang CINTA yang gw alami secara real... asli lebih banyak sedihnya daripada bahagianya. Kalian mau tau kenapa? Gw ceritain yang sedih dulu aja kali yah...
Pertama gw pacaran itu kelas 2 SMP hehee tapi... gw mulai tertarik sama cowok itu kelas 5 SD. Inget, cuma tertarik loh bukan pacaran yang bilang sayank... nah, pas kelas 8 SMP itu pacaran selama 7bulan kalo ngga salah inisial "DS" kalo janjian di belakang sekolah pas lagi tenar lagunya Acha&Irwansyah My heart jadi tempat terbiasa bersama ya di belakang sekolah :D cuma ngobrol doank itu pun jauh"an dan temen yang suka nemenin namanya Olive sama Herman tau deh olive masih inget apa ngga.. nah, selama pacaran sama DS ini gw gak pernah sakit ati sedikitpun, justru bahagia karna dia lucu, baik, sweet lagi... tapi ntah kenapa kita putus, gw lupa :D
Next, setelah putus dari DS gw focus ke pelajaran. Lama tuh gw gak maen pacar"an.Tapi selama duduk di kelas 9 ini banyak yang suka sksd gitu, ada nih 4 sekawan ini yang suka sama gw semua tapi dari ke tiga ini ngalah sama inisial "SA". Kenapa gw bisa menyimpulkan ini karna ada salah seorang dari 4 sekawan ini cerita ke gw inisial "SM" itu pun dia cerita pas jauh udah lulus dari SMP bahkan pas gw udah kerja.
Gw jalan ke pantai ni sama si SM nah dia cerita kalo waktu SMP tuh sebenernya mereka semua suka sama gw.. nah dari situ gw cengo alias bengong... cuma karna SA yang terlalu menonjolkan rasa suka ke gw jadi mereka ngalah, katanya sih gitu.. inisial "AM" sama "R" ini gak pernah ni ngobrol berdua sama gw, tapi yang di tau inisial "R" ini di kagumi sama salah satu sahabat gw namanya Suryaningsih. Setiap di kelas selalu di cengin sama anak" apalagi gw suka ngajak maen kerumah sahabat gw yang satu lagi yang deket sama rumah si R ini , namanya wiwit w. Sumpah gw sayang banget sama kalian tapi tiba" persahabatan kita hancur karna sebab yang ngga jelas. Cukup, kalo di ungkit gw bisa mewek sambil ngetik.
Selesai masa pendekatan si SA ini nembak gw, tapi sayang gw tolak dan alesannya gw "ngga bisa" udah gitu aja pas dia tanya kenapa gw cuma bisa jawab "gpp, ngga bisa aja" alhamdulillah dia nerimo. Padahal si 4 sekawan ini ya bisa di bilang kaya muka" film meteor garden kali yah :D (ngga ada yang jelek).
Cusss ke masa berikutnya...
Awalnya gak tau gimana cuma Erni sahabat dari orok gw ini bilang "tul, di cariin kiki" nah gw bingung padahal gak pernah tuh gw ngobrol serius sama qq atau "RF".. gw cuek dong gw bodo amat..
Pas pulang gw tanya ke Erni, kenapa dia nyariin gw katanya ngga tau.. tukeran no hp smsn lama" nyambung dan gw nyaman, suka...
Dia ngajak ketemuan tuuuhh... dimana coba? di tempat Parkir! Ampun dah.
Lagi itu pas gw di kelas lagi, ada dodo nyamperin ke kelas katanya di tungguin RF. Gw samperin tuh ke parkiran ngobrol" eh dia bunuh gw, bunuh kesepian hati gw.
Karna hati tak bisa di pungkiri hati pun menjawab Ia.
Selama sama RF ini lumayan gak nyaman nih pas di jalani, kenapa?
Nanti di akhir cerita ini lu pasti akan tau jawabannya.
Awall dia main kan ke rumah sama ASM dan YI .
Nah si YI ini apel ke rumah Yola pacarnya dan si ASM ini ke rumah yuni y masih pdkt, kebetulan mereka adik kelas dan gak jauh rumahnya sama gw. Yang lucu ASM ini ko sebentar maennya, ternyata eh ternyata pas di tanya
" ko bentar amat ha, kenapa?"
Katanya "gak boleh maen sama bapake" gw ketawa tuh sama RF.
Kita tanya lagi nih,"terus gimana" jawabannya unik
"gw kerumah manto ki, gw nulis aja surat buat yuni, tapi gw bilang ke manto.. nanti pura" nanya pelajaran aja ke yuni "
nah kata gw sama RF "pinter" lu ha, jadi kalian cuma surat"an donk?"
Sautnya " iya, duh jand" ( sambil ketawa kecil )
Sabar ya ha, belum waktunya :D .. nah tinggal si YI nih yang anteng gak balik"..
ini pertama" gw jadian sama RF masih baik" aja .. lama" gw ngerasa RF ini ngejauhin gw dan pergi tanpa ucapan selamat tinggal ( ah elah )...
Akhirnya putus tanpa keputusan dan di tenari dengan lagunya Lobow - salah..
Di nada sambungan, jaman gw SMP mah lagi booming tuh NSP gitu.. jujur gw nyesek banget waktu itu, dan gw benci banget sama RF setiap jam istirahat, selesai dari mushola kan lewat depan kelas dia nih, si Erni ngajak basa basi karna RF ini sekelas sama Erni, kalo liat RF ini gw langsung pergi.
Nyesek gw! Dulu yah.. sekarang udah gak ada rasa..
Jauh kedepan gw masih penasaran kenapa dia pergi gitu aja.
Jajang tetangga 5 langkah ini gw suruh nanya ke RF basa basi aja.. nanya" dan hasilnya gw tanya di perjalanan pulang sambil goes sepeda..
Jawabannya pun cukup bikin gw sakiittt banget..
katanya "gw cuma jadi pelampiasannya doank karna abis putus dari pacarnya".
Pas denger itu gw pura" tegar depan mereka, padahal mah uuhhh gw sakiit banget :'( ..
Kita pulang ber3 sama Erni n Jajang biasanya sama Suryaningsih juga, tapi lagi gak baik jadi cuma ber3.
Nah kata Erni juga gitu pernah denger itu.
Dari situ gw langsung tuh sms RF tentang itu dia gak bales sama sekali, tapi... efeknya pas di sekolahan nih, besoknya pas lagi ada lomba sepak bola RF dkk ada di lapangan dan gw di kelas biasa ngerumpi sama cewe"...
Tiba" Erni teriak dari kelas dia "tul... kelapangan"
kata gw " hah?apah?" Karna jauh dan mugkin Erni takut kedengeran guru soalnya ruang kelas dia sebelahan sama ruang guru.
"RF, Jajang .. situuu ( nunjuk kearah lapangan)" sautnya..
Gw penasaran, apaan sih Erwek gak jelas. Gw samperin nih, pas tengah perjalanan baru di perjelas sama Erni "jajang berantem sama RF"
Spontan gw panik dan lari kearah lapangan.. gw cari" mereka gak ada, gw nanya ke salah satu anak ..
Katanya "jajang abis di pukul sama RF" ya Allah gw langsung nyebut..
gw tanya lagi.. " terus sekarang kemana mereka?" Katanya "kesana" (sambil nunjuk) .
Gw balik kearah kelas, gw tanya Erni lagi "liat ngga?",
"kesana tul" (sambil nunjuk).
Ampun dah gw jadi gemeteran gini (dalem hati) nah pas gw mau ke kelas jajang ketemu dia lagi lari ketakutan sambil bilang
" tul, RF tuh " sambil nangis, karna dia baru masuk SMP udah di gituin sama anak kelas 9 ya pasti takut lah.
" kenapa? Lu di apain?" Tanya gw, dia masih ngosngosan sambil nangis dan wajah ketakutan.
Gw tanya lagi " lu di pukul? Di tonjok sama RF?"
Baru dia jawab "Ngga, cuma dia udah ngepalin tangan gitu tadi di lapangan, terus gw langsung lari. Gw nyariin lu tul" tambahnya.
Sambil tanya" RF dkk ada di belakang jajang nih jalan santai dan gw liat emang mereka pasang muka serem dan RF masih mengepalkan tangan..
pas dia liat jajang sama gw, mereka pada balik badan.
Sejak kejadian itu besoknya jajang gak mau masuk sekolah dan gw semakin benci sama RF. Selang beberapa hari dia gak masuk sekolah, bokap jajang nanya ke gw
"sebenernya jajang ada masalah apa sih ta di sekolah, ko di suruh sekolah katanya takut" gw cuma bisa jawab "kemaren ada temen saya wa yang bla bla bla.." gw lupa jawab apa. Tanpa pikir panjang bokap jajang pun ke sekolah donk minta penjelasan kenapa anaknya ketakutan kalo di suruh sekolah. Ngga lama beliau pun Tau kalo RF dkk yang jadi alesan J ini gak masuk sekolah. Semenjak itu gw nyesel banget udah bawa" J ke masalah gw... dan selesai dari masalah itu gw males banget banget banget liat muka RF ini...
Selesai masalah percintaan di waktu Remaja...
Besok lanjut ke tahap berikutnya...
Tunggu season duanya yaa...
Wassalamualaikum...
Tragedy - Christina Perri
If you could envision
The meaning of a tragedy
You might be surprised to hear it's you and me
But when it comes down to it
You never made the most of it
So I cried cried cried
And now I say goodbye
And I won't be made a fool of...
Don't call this love
When did you decide I didn't have enough to buy
Forgive and forget you a thousand times
For the fire and the sleepless nights
And I won't be made a fool of...
Don't call this love
Don't call this love
La la la la la la la la la la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la la la la
Why did you feel the need
To prove that everyone was right...
No I ... won't fight
You're my tragedy tragedy
tragedy
You're my tragedy
This is ohhh no no no no no
La la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la la la la la la lala la
What I've Done - Linkin Park
In this farewell
There’s no blood
There’s no alibi
‘Cause I’ve drawn regret
For the truth
Of a thousand lies
So let mercy come
And wash away
What I’ve done
I’ve faced myself
To cross out what I’ve become
Erase myself
And let go of what I’ve done
Put to rest
What you thought of me
Well I cleaned this slate
With the hands of uncertainty
So let mercy come
And wash away
What I’ve done
I’ve faced myself
To cross out what I’ve become
Erase myself
And let go of what I’ve done
For what I’ve done
I’ll start again
And whatever pain may come
Today this ends
I’m forgiving what I’ve done
I’ve faced myself
To cross out what I’ve become
Erase myself
And let go of what I’ve done
What I’ve Done
Forgiving what I’ve done
Crawling - Linkin Park
Crawling in my skin
These wounds, they will not heal
Fear is how I fall
Confusing what is real
There's something inside me that pulls beneath the surface
Consuming, confusing
This lack of self control I fear is never ending
Controlling
I can't seem
To find myself again
My walls are closing in
(Without a sense of confidence I’m convinced that there’s just too much pressure to take)
I've felt this way before
So insecure
Crawling in my skin
These wounds, they will not heal
Fear is how I fall
Confusing what is real
Discomfort, endlessly has pulled itself upon me
Distracting, reacting
Against my will I stand beside my own reflection
It's haunting how
I can't seem...
To find myse lf again
My walls are closing in
(Without a sense of confidence I’m convinced that there’s just too much pressure to take)
I've felt this way before
So insecure
Crawling in my skin
These wounds, they will not heal
Fear is how I fall
Confusing what is real
There's something inside me that pulls beneath the surface
Consuming,
Confusing what is real
There's something inside me that pulls beneath the surface
Consuming,
Confusing what is real
Somewhere I Belong - Linkin Park
(When this began)
I had nothing to say
And I get lost in the nothingness inside of me
(I was confused)
And I let it all out to find
That I’m not the only person with these things in mind
(Inside of me)
But all that they can see the words revealed
Is the only real thing that I’ve got left to feel
(Nothing to lose)
Just stuck, hollow and alone
And the fault is my own, and the fault is my own
I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real
I wanna let go of the pain I’ve felt so long
(Erase all the pain till it’s gone)
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I’m close to something real
I wanna find something I’ve wanted all along
Somewhere I belong
And I’ve got nothing to say
I can’t believe I didn’t fall right down on my face
(I was confused)
Looking everywhere only to find
That it’s not the way I had imagined it all in my mind
(So what am I)
What do I have but negativity
’Cause I can’t justify the way, everyone is looking at me
(Nothing to lose)
Nothing to gain, hollow and alone
And the fault is my own, and the fault is my own
I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real
I wanna let go of the pain I’ve felt so long
(Erase all the pain till it’s gone)
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I’m close to something real
I wanna find something I’ve wanted all along
Somewhere I belong
I will never know myself until I do this on my own
And I will never feel anything else, until my wounds are healed
I will never be anything till I break away from me
I will break away, I’ll find myself today
I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real
I wanna let go of the pain I’ve felt so long
(Erase all the pain till it’s gone)
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I’m close to something real
I wanna find something I’ve wanted all along
Somewhere I belong
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I’m somewhere I belong
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I’m somewhere I belong
Somewhere I belong
Waiting For The End - Linkin Park
This is not the end, this is not the beginning
Just a voice like a riot rocking every revision
But you listen to the tone and the violent rhythm
Though the words sound steady something empty's within them
We say yeah with fists flying up in the air
Like we're holding onto something that's invisible there
Cause we're living at the mercy of the pain and the fear
Until we dead it, forget it, let it all disappear
Waiting for the end to come
Wishing I had strength to stand
This is not what I had planned
It's out of my control
Flying at the speed of light
Thoughts were spinning in my head
So many things were left unsaid
It's hard to let you go
I know what it takes to move on
I know how it feels to lie
All I want to do
Is trade this life for something new
Holding on to what I haven't got
Sitting in an empty room
Trying to forget the past
This was never meant to las
I wish it wasn't so
I know what it takes to move on
I know how it feels to lie
All I want to do
Is trade this life for something new
Holding on to what I haven't got
What was left when that fire was gone
I thought it felt right but that right was wrong
All caught up in the eye of the storm
And trying to figure out what it's like moving on
And I don't even know what kind of things I said
My mouth kept moving and my mind went dead
So I'm picking up the pieces, now where to begin
The hardest part of ending is starting again
All I want to do
Is trade this life for something new
Holding on to what I haven't got
I'm holding on to what I haven't got
I'm holding on to what I haven't got
This is not the end, this is not the beginning
Just a voice like a riot rocking every revision
But you listen to the tone and the violent rhythm
Though the words sound steady something empty's within them
We say yeah with fists flying up in the air
Like we're holding onto something that's invisible there
Cause we're living at the mercy of the pain and the fear
Until we dead it, forget it, let it all disappear
In The End - Linkin Park
One thing, I don't know why
It doesn't even matter how hard you try
Keep that in mind I designed this rhyme
To explain in due time
All I know, time is a valuable thing
Watch it fly by as the pendulum swings
Watch it count down to the end of the day
The clock ticks life away
It's so unreal, didn't look out below
Watch the time go right out the window
Trying to hold on but didn't even know
Wasted it all just to watch you go
I kept everything inside and even though I tried it all fell apart
What it meant to me will eventually be a memory of a time when
CHORUS
I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn't even matter
I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end
It doesn't even matter
One thing, I don't know why
Doesn't even matter how hard you try
Keep that in mind I designed this rhyme
To remind myself how I tried so hard
Despite of the way you were mocking me
Acting like I was part of your property
Remembering all the times you fought with me
I'm surprised it got so far
Things aren't the way they were before
You wouldn't even recognize me anymore
Not that you knew me back then
But it all comes back to me in the end
You kept everything inside and even though I tried it all fell apart
What it meant to me will eventually be a memory of a time when
CHORUS
I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn't even matter
I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end
It doesn't even matter
(2x)
I put my trust in you
Pushed as far as I can go
And for all this
There's only one thing you should know
CHORUS
I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn't even matter
I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end
It doesn't even matter
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